The daily adventures and travails of one neurotic, klutzy, hungry, cynical college girl. Tune in for prizes! (offer void where prohibited. See office for details. Not responsible for lost articles.)
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Friday, January 20, 2006
Is it coincidence or brilliance that Mrs. Kate Cruise nee Katie Holmes plays a character that mirrors the film exactly, in "Pieces of April"? Meaning, she is engaging, but almost instantly forgettable when end credits roll. The movie, in the long tradition of gay filmmakers making a real life parallel tribue to their mother, is sweet and enjoyable. But like overhearing to your coworker talk on the phone to their unloving and growingly insensitive boyfriends, it's okay for time killing, but nothing to write home about or even raise an eyebrow.
Maybe I'm remembering things differently, but didn't the critics rave about Katie's performance? Were they surprised to see her make an effort at subtle, after watching her mug and twitch on the "Creek"? She does April justice, because April is practically a non-persona. For someone who the rest of the family fears, loathes, and resents, I saw very little reason for alarm. It's not like she matured recently, it felt more like she took a large amount of elephant traquilizers the night before. But then, why wouldn't her moon-faced yapping sister flinch when being affectionately nuzzled at the dinner by her older sister who used to trim her siblings' bangs with lighters?
Oliver Platt is an actor I used to admire. I walked around my dorm hall, loudly proclaiming "Oliver Platt is the most underrated actor!" I don't remember what prompted my advocation, but it's gone now. Especially after watching him play such a simpering fool in this film. I get it, Oliver. You're a sweet father trying to keep everything together during a hard period. But unless your secret character motivation is that the father has been away for 16 years and has to keep the family intact for an ulterior motive, I don't buy this overly earnest performance. You're better than that, Olly. Also, don't do "Any Given Sunday." Go back in time, and don't do it. You can also refuse that godawful Neve Campbell/Matthew Perry tripe you pranced in. Don't be that guy.
People, Sisqo is in the film. And I didn't hate that. When the film has subdued you to something equivalent of a warm bath, you suddenly don't care what out-of-date-by-post-production rapper is playing a small role to gain indie cred as an actor. Then the water gets colder and you just want to get out.
That picture is of Patricia Clarkson, who gives a healthy performance. She was nuanced, specific in choices, and real. Nice. She also participates in the best scenes. The awkward burial of the roadkill that substitutes for her future funeral. The bathroom epiphany including white tights! Washing the vomit from her cheap wig. Feeling sexy and foot fore playing her car driving husband in front of children and mother as she listens to Smack Daddy. I could go on and on. I'd watch this again, just for her. Cause I did like the film. Just not gratuitously.
Sean Hayes, no matter what you do, you're the same man. I'm Sean Hayes, gay as a violet violin, mincing so hard, maybe i'm really straight! I'm Sean Hayes, such a giant Hollywood ass hat in "Win a Date with Tad Hamilton", maybe I'm gay! I'm sEAN hAYES, odd and unusual, in this film, maybe nobody cares about my sexuality since no one really wants to sleep with me.
Okay, this is long enough for a film review about a film I don't really care about. I really thought I would after realizing I'm going through lots of the same stunff April is going through. But hey, why does independent spirit have to mean I dress ugly? And I can't cook. And I can't keep my apt clean. And I'm poor.
Okay FINE. The above is all true. They got me. UGh.
11:52 AM
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