The daily adventures and travails of one neurotic, klutzy, hungry, cynical college girl. Tune in for prizes! (offer void where prohibited. See office for details. Not responsible for lost articles.)
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Friday, September 09, 2005
Did you know Alicia Silverstone fell into the street the other night? Do you care?
No?
Well put this on for size-
I JUST FELL INTO THE STREET!
Don't read that as excited. I'm embarrassed. It fucking hurts. My shoes are on the tight side and I've been getting rubbed raw all day on the sides of my feet. I guess that's why my quickened pace led to this. I was walking back to work, with my dessert purchase in hand, hoping to get to the lunchroom soon. Suddenly I see pavement headed for my face. I'm lying in the street, and the valet across the street is exclaiming "Are you okay?"
I say I'm fine, jump up, and run across to my building. Only then do I discover my jeans are ripped at the left knee. I peer in to see bloody, gouged skin. Yuck.
I run to my office and explain in a hurry as I grab some salve and bandaids. Of COURSE, now i have to pee. So i head to hte bathroom (shoeless, as i threw off the offending objects) and drop everything while I do my business. A coworker comes and commits one of my pet peeves: talking to me while I'm in the stall.
Guess what the twist is now?
The stall suddenly pops open while i'm pantless and balancing my cream, tape and gauze on my thigh, lifted onto the door. The lock has malfunctioned, people.
By the time I write this, I am the visual depiction of DISGRUNTLED.
2:06 PM
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1 Comments:
it's kinda like that time when i was at my grandfather's funeral and i had just seen my mom breakdown and was all shook up, and i was doing the sanitary hover when the door pops open not 1, 2, or 3 times but 6!!!! times as i'm trying to pee. and they were all men and happened back to back. you'd think if you saw the first guy open the door and spring out, the other guys would get the hint. but NOOoOooOoooO!
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