The daily adventures and travails of one neurotic, klutzy, hungry, cynical college girl. Tune in for prizes! (offer void where prohibited. See office for details. Not responsible for lost articles.)
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Monday, January 27, 2003
Depressed after an exchange with my mom. Once in a blue moon, she and I will have it out. Tonight, she called and indirectly let me know what a slacker and disappointment I am to her. Okay, so I forgot to do a favor for her this weekend. And it was totally my fault, since I was too busy hanging with friends and planning the Superbowl thing. But it still hurts that she was so harsh to me. And it makes me feel guilty to say this, but I'm tired of still doing errands for my parents. I understand that it's hard for them, but I have work to do too. I make it a point never to ask them for favors. I don't know if I'm an selfish, lazy ingrate or if they're co-dependent manipulators with too little confidence. The whole concept of family is fucked up and outdated. We should all be bred in labs and hold no ties to anyone, but those people we choose for ourselves. I'm tired of bills. I'm tired of being happy for people. I'm tired of work. I'm tired of paperwork to fill out. I'm tired of school. It's a very dangerous time for me. I get like this twice a year or so, and I'm no fun company.
Isn't it funny, though? I was laying on my bed, lumpy-throated and wondering why things have come to this sad state of affairs. Then three of my friends called to me, even though I debated hiding and ignoring them. I answered their thoughtful calls and I find myself with plans for the evening. Thanks, guys. Even when I'm being a pathetic, stubborn hermit, you refused to let me wallow in self-pity. Let me do the same favor for you sometime.
I saw Richard from Fairfax today and forgot his name. I feel bad about that. He's so sensitive I didn't want to ask his name, so instead I made superficial talk and poor Tommy (what unfair coincidence brought him to the shuttle stop at the same time?) didn't get an introduction or much of my attention. Fortunately, Linda came over soon and she was a bubbly fountain of social interaction. (She is now sprawled on the sofa and semi-concious) I'm still uncomfortable about the awkward talk I had with him, but I remembered Richard's name after he left. I'll have to be extra nice to him the next time I see him. Poor guy, he harbors the delusion that I'm a nice girl. Ha.
Aww. I love calls from Courtney. There's no fooling her when I'm down. She'll get right to the point and fix whatever issues I have. I'm feeling oodles better. I actually cracked a smile once. (ooh...!)
ERIC HAS NO BRACES!! I'm dying of curiosity to see the new him. I should be like Graceness and just go over to his place to invade. But 1) I'm lazy and tired from today's events and 2) that would be a tad scary for him and Andrei, both. So, I'll just watch Joe Millionaire and Best in Show (yea, again.)
9:07 PM
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